So after my almost year of being a mom, I thought I would write down some things that really worked for use. Now, by no means am I a professional and I know every baby is different. I come from a big family so I thought I was prepared. All of my life I grew up watching my cousins children, my neighbors, and my nieces and nephews. I was convinced I was 100% prepared to become a mom. Boy was I mistaken. Being a mom is not something you get paid to do. It's not something you leave after a few hours of playing in the sand. It's not watching movies all day while eating candy. It is hard work and a full time job. I know this will be long, but I also know that there might be one person who this will benefit. So buckle up, it's going to be a bumpy ride.
Pregnancy:
Now, not everyone who reads this will have to be as strict as I had to be or be considered a high risk pregnancy, but here is what worked for me (do I sound like a broken record yet?).
-Spencer and I talked about having a baby for a full year before actually getting the courage to "try" to get pregnant. With that I worked hard with my doctor to get my A1c at a stable 6.9 before getting pregnant. I averaged a 6.0 my entire pregnancy.
-No matter how crappy or tired I felt, I moved EVERY DAY. Even if it was a small walk, a weight lifting sesh, or yoga, I moved. (this helped through labor, not gaining weight, and losing weight afterward)
-Even though every morning for 14 weeks I woke up with green gills and wanted to hurl, I ate. Low blood sugars heavily contribute to morning sickness. So to stop that you have to eat. Dry, non-sugared cereal my friends.
-I drank 90 ounces of water a day
-I always had fruit and vegetables cut up in my fridge to snack on instead of sugary treats.
-I did listen to my body (and the very few cravings I had), but I limited to sugary snacks and treats to once a day.
-Soaked my feet in cold water (all of the time, especially near the end)
Hospital:
-Brought a robe to wear around (hospital gowns are yucky)
-I packed and wore yoga pants, nursing bra, and loose V-Necks. I had my eyelashes tinted so I didn't bring mascara, foundation, or any make-up. I only washed my body and wore braids the rest of the time for my long 3 day stay.
-Some don't like the nursery (umm what!?) because of weird myths, but I promise the nurses don't feed your baby sugar water while your baby is in there. We didn't have a choice for Evie. Take advantage of putting your baby in there for a few hours so you can sleep. The nurses and doctors will take care of them and they will do a good job letting you know of any problems.
-Ask questions without hesitation.
-Let the nurses and lactation specialists help you with breastfeeding BEFORE you leave. I was so nervous asking for help, but all of the nurses have seen boobs before, they don't compare you to others. After I asked, it was sooo much better.
-Take all of the supplies you can (mesh grandma underwear, witch hazel wipes, spray bottles, diapers).
-Let people visit and take care of you.
First 4 weeks:
-RELAX, when you can. Let people serve you, and eat LOTS of healthy calories. Ice cream is considered healthy in my books ;)
-I nursed... It's painful and weird to get used to. Use nipple cream, ice, and you or your husband massage your boobs. I used a boppy pillow (which was a huge help with Evie's broken arm). DON'T GIVE UP.
-Swaddling was huge for us. We ended up using the Halo Sleep sack, but we didn't start sleep training until 4 weeks.
-Have lots of extra clothes for baby (and you) when going out
-Let Daddy help, even if you're thinking you've got it. You will need breaks!
-Go on a walk every day.
Four weeks to three months:
SLEEPING-
**For us, sleeping habits became significantly better once her arm was healed and she was out of her brace**
-We did the same routine every night... lavender infused lotion, clean diaper and pj's, sleep sack, nursed in dark room, lay in crib.
-We had a blue night light and that was the only light. She slept 10 hours a night from 4 weeks to just shy of 5 months
-If she cried, we wouldn't say anything, we would put her binky back in and walk out (repeated if needed) and only picked up if she was acting hungry.
-She was in her own room which helped a ton.
-I put my top I had worn for that day in her crib and that way she could smell me
-Put in crib when baby is almost asleep, not all the way alseep
EATING-
-I solely nursed until 6 weeks old. At six weeks, I started bottle training so I could go back to work when she turned 12 weeks.
-I pumped every hour and nursed every other feeding
OTHER-
-Do tummy time! Evie hated being on the ground for a while, so we practiced on our chests
-Socks over hands
-Have bathroom extra warm for bathing and make sure room is warm but not hot.
-For you, start slowly exercising (per your doctor's okay)
-Evie spit-up like crazy! We always had to pack extra burp clothes
-She also would get super gassy. We used gas drops on the daily, lightly massaged her feet, rubbed her belly, and kept her sitting upright for 15 min after each feeding. All helped a ton.
-Fisher Price Rock N Play to let her sleep in and to put her in to get chores done
-Ergo-carrier. Huge life saver and best investment ever!
Four to six months:
-Evie had really bad sleep regressions for a solid month once she turned 5 months old and again at 9 months, but stopped at 10 months. So for sleep, I don't have a ton of good advice here, but keep trying and don't give up. Lavender in our diffuser and sleep sack did help from screaming. She was just up and wanted to be up.
-For food, we started oatmeal right at 4 months. Rice was too sticky and E did not like it. We did nursing or bottles for feeding and very basic foods like peas or carrots.
-Use simple toys (rattles, pie tins for kicking, fuzzy soft toys)
-Read books every day/night
-Listen to lullaby's or baby rhyme songs during day to help engage baby
-For daycare we wrote out schedule for eating so it wouldn't mess-up our schedule on the weekends
Seven months plus:
SLEEPING-
-We found for sleeping it helped us to have a sleeping blanket. She would only get it when it was night time. That way when she got this said blanket, she knew it was bed time. We stopped using our sleep sack at this point.
-We used the same routine as before, but we no longer give her my tops. We sing a few songs and read one story to help relax her before I nurse her.
-When she cries we really started using the Cry it out theory and it helps. We will walk in and put her binky in her mouth and re-tuck her in. We hardly pick her up or talk to her when she cries at night. She is now sleeping 8-11 hours at night.
-She sleeps better if she has had two two hour naps during the day.
-Put baby in crib after bottle/nursing even if they have their eyes open. I say the same phrase every night before I put her to bed. I repeat this phrase if she is crying in the middle of the night if needed. I say, "Okay Evie, it's time for bed. Good night, Mommy loves you." Then I kiss her good night. Works like a charm
EATING-
-Try lots of food (different colors, textures, and shapes) Evie will now eat anything, and she started grabbing and picking up food really early (about 7 1/2 months) and now she won't stop.
-I still nurse her, but only in the morning for breakfast and at night for bedtime.
OTHER-
-Read and play on the ground with baby
-Rub gums as often as you can once teething starts
-Buy those teething toys. They will save you! Just keep them simple.
-Continue to do tummy time to help with crawling and balance.
-Sensory play is so important at this stage, encourage baby to play peek-a-boo, grab toys, and feel different textures.
Other/Misc:
For this section, it's so random, but I most of these tips could fall into all of the above categories.
-Don't let anyone tell you you're doing something wrong or weird
-Make mommy friends (to relate to and to vent to oh and have a life)
-You're going to have bad days, don't let them discourage you. You are doing the best you possibly can, no matter what.
-Buy cheap t-shirts to wear (Hello Walmart and Target)
-You know your baby best, so you, not anyone else, needs to make the rules and schedule.
-With schedules, I would make one and stick to it on most days. Just know that things will happen so you also need to learn to be flexible. Don't be too hard on yourself if your sleeping schedule is running behind. (Same with eating and playtime)
-Let your husband help and try not to yell or get upset when he does something different.
-Listen to your mom. You are likely to be more like her than you think.
-Yes, let others hold your baby, especially those first few months. Listen to your baby and pay attention to your baby's signals of not wanting to be passed off. No need to scare them, and others should respect that.
-Snuggle them EVERY DAY!
-Talk to your baby, that will help them communicate later on
-It's okay to say no, but say yes more.
-If you don't like what someone is doing to your baby (while babysitting, holding, feeding, etc.) tell them. You need to advocate for your baby.
-Don't push your baby to do things like crawling. They will happen on their own when your baby is ready.
-Look at yourself everyday in the mirror without clothing and love your body. I have many stretch marks and even though I work out and weigh less than before I got pregnant, I have saggy skin. It is beautiful. Tell yourself every day that you are beautiful and full of divine worth.
-Tell your baby you love them all of the time and show that same affection to your husband in front of your baby.
-Buy a basic kit of essential oils (lavender especially!)
-Get a Thera Pearl heating/cooling pack. I sat on a frozen one every day for a week when I came home from the hospital. I have also used it when Evie has had really bad constipation. She loves when I heat it up now and put it on her belly.
-Boudreux's Butt paste is the bomb!
-Limit TV time, yes it's going to happen, but honestly I only let E watch 1 hour maybe and 1 1/2 of TV a day. There are much better ways to occupy and help your baby learn (sensory toys, reading, you). She knows when we do watch a movie it is a treat, and I get really good cuddles.
-Get a portable fan to clip on car seat for the summer
Well that's it. It has been a lot of trial and error these last few months. You will grow as much as your baby will, in different ways of course. I have been so grateful that I've learned hard and easy things to help me be a better mom and wife. I really hope this helps at least someone!
Go forth and be the best Mommy you can!
Pregnancy:
Now, not everyone who reads this will have to be as strict as I had to be or be considered a high risk pregnancy, but here is what worked for me (do I sound like a broken record yet?).
-Spencer and I talked about having a baby for a full year before actually getting the courage to "try" to get pregnant. With that I worked hard with my doctor to get my A1c at a stable 6.9 before getting pregnant. I averaged a 6.0 my entire pregnancy.
-No matter how crappy or tired I felt, I moved EVERY DAY. Even if it was a small walk, a weight lifting sesh, or yoga, I moved. (this helped through labor, not gaining weight, and losing weight afterward)
-Even though every morning for 14 weeks I woke up with green gills and wanted to hurl, I ate. Low blood sugars heavily contribute to morning sickness. So to stop that you have to eat. Dry, non-sugared cereal my friends.
-I drank 90 ounces of water a day
-I always had fruit and vegetables cut up in my fridge to snack on instead of sugary treats.
-I did listen to my body (and the very few cravings I had), but I limited to sugary snacks and treats to once a day.
-Soaked my feet in cold water (all of the time, especially near the end)
Hospital:
-Brought a robe to wear around (hospital gowns are yucky)
-I packed and wore yoga pants, nursing bra, and loose V-Necks. I had my eyelashes tinted so I didn't bring mascara, foundation, or any make-up. I only washed my body and wore braids the rest of the time for my long 3 day stay.
-Some don't like the nursery (umm what!?) because of weird myths, but I promise the nurses don't feed your baby sugar water while your baby is in there. We didn't have a choice for Evie. Take advantage of putting your baby in there for a few hours so you can sleep. The nurses and doctors will take care of them and they will do a good job letting you know of any problems.
-Ask questions without hesitation.
-Let the nurses and lactation specialists help you with breastfeeding BEFORE you leave. I was so nervous asking for help, but all of the nurses have seen boobs before, they don't compare you to others. After I asked, it was sooo much better.
-Take all of the supplies you can (mesh grandma underwear, witch hazel wipes, spray bottles, diapers).
-Let people visit and take care of you.
First 4 weeks:
-RELAX, when you can. Let people serve you, and eat LOTS of healthy calories. Ice cream is considered healthy in my books ;)
-I nursed... It's painful and weird to get used to. Use nipple cream, ice, and you or your husband massage your boobs. I used a boppy pillow (which was a huge help with Evie's broken arm). DON'T GIVE UP.
-Swaddling was huge for us. We ended up using the Halo Sleep sack, but we didn't start sleep training until 4 weeks.
-Have lots of extra clothes for baby (and you) when going out
-Let Daddy help, even if you're thinking you've got it. You will need breaks!
-Go on a walk every day.
Four weeks to three months:
SLEEPING-
**For us, sleeping habits became significantly better once her arm was healed and she was out of her brace**
-We did the same routine every night... lavender infused lotion, clean diaper and pj's, sleep sack, nursed in dark room, lay in crib.
-We had a blue night light and that was the only light. She slept 10 hours a night from 4 weeks to just shy of 5 months
-If she cried, we wouldn't say anything, we would put her binky back in and walk out (repeated if needed) and only picked up if she was acting hungry.
-She was in her own room which helped a ton.
-I put my top I had worn for that day in her crib and that way she could smell me
-Put in crib when baby is almost asleep, not all the way alseep
EATING-
-I solely nursed until 6 weeks old. At six weeks, I started bottle training so I could go back to work when she turned 12 weeks.
-I pumped every hour and nursed every other feeding
OTHER-
-Do tummy time! Evie hated being on the ground for a while, so we practiced on our chests
-Socks over hands
-Have bathroom extra warm for bathing and make sure room is warm but not hot.
-For you, start slowly exercising (per your doctor's okay)
-Evie spit-up like crazy! We always had to pack extra burp clothes
-She also would get super gassy. We used gas drops on the daily, lightly massaged her feet, rubbed her belly, and kept her sitting upright for 15 min after each feeding. All helped a ton.
-Fisher Price Rock N Play to let her sleep in and to put her in to get chores done
-Ergo-carrier. Huge life saver and best investment ever!
Four to six months:
-Evie had really bad sleep regressions for a solid month once she turned 5 months old and again at 9 months, but stopped at 10 months. So for sleep, I don't have a ton of good advice here, but keep trying and don't give up. Lavender in our diffuser and sleep sack did help from screaming. She was just up and wanted to be up.
-For food, we started oatmeal right at 4 months. Rice was too sticky and E did not like it. We did nursing or bottles for feeding and very basic foods like peas or carrots.
-Use simple toys (rattles, pie tins for kicking, fuzzy soft toys)
-Read books every day/night
-Listen to lullaby's or baby rhyme songs during day to help engage baby
-For daycare we wrote out schedule for eating so it wouldn't mess-up our schedule on the weekends
Seven months plus:
SLEEPING-
-We found for sleeping it helped us to have a sleeping blanket. She would only get it when it was night time. That way when she got this said blanket, she knew it was bed time. We stopped using our sleep sack at this point.
-We used the same routine as before, but we no longer give her my tops. We sing a few songs and read one story to help relax her before I nurse her.
-When she cries we really started using the Cry it out theory and it helps. We will walk in and put her binky in her mouth and re-tuck her in. We hardly pick her up or talk to her when she cries at night. She is now sleeping 8-11 hours at night.
-She sleeps better if she has had two two hour naps during the day.
-Put baby in crib after bottle/nursing even if they have their eyes open. I say the same phrase every night before I put her to bed. I repeat this phrase if she is crying in the middle of the night if needed. I say, "Okay Evie, it's time for bed. Good night, Mommy loves you." Then I kiss her good night. Works like a charm
EATING-
-Try lots of food (different colors, textures, and shapes) Evie will now eat anything, and she started grabbing and picking up food really early (about 7 1/2 months) and now she won't stop.
-I still nurse her, but only in the morning for breakfast and at night for bedtime.
OTHER-
-Read and play on the ground with baby
-Rub gums as often as you can once teething starts
-Buy those teething toys. They will save you! Just keep them simple.
-Continue to do tummy time to help with crawling and balance.
-Sensory play is so important at this stage, encourage baby to play peek-a-boo, grab toys, and feel different textures.
Other/Misc:
For this section, it's so random, but I most of these tips could fall into all of the above categories.
-Don't let anyone tell you you're doing something wrong or weird
-Make mommy friends (to relate to and to vent to oh and have a life)
-You're going to have bad days, don't let them discourage you. You are doing the best you possibly can, no matter what.
-Buy cheap t-shirts to wear (Hello Walmart and Target)
-You know your baby best, so you, not anyone else, needs to make the rules and schedule.
-With schedules, I would make one and stick to it on most days. Just know that things will happen so you also need to learn to be flexible. Don't be too hard on yourself if your sleeping schedule is running behind. (Same with eating and playtime)
-Let your husband help and try not to yell or get upset when he does something different.
-Listen to your mom. You are likely to be more like her than you think.
-Yes, let others hold your baby, especially those first few months. Listen to your baby and pay attention to your baby's signals of not wanting to be passed off. No need to scare them, and others should respect that.
-Snuggle them EVERY DAY!
-Talk to your baby, that will help them communicate later on
-It's okay to say no, but say yes more.
-If you don't like what someone is doing to your baby (while babysitting, holding, feeding, etc.) tell them. You need to advocate for your baby.
-Don't push your baby to do things like crawling. They will happen on their own when your baby is ready.
-Look at yourself everyday in the mirror without clothing and love your body. I have many stretch marks and even though I work out and weigh less than before I got pregnant, I have saggy skin. It is beautiful. Tell yourself every day that you are beautiful and full of divine worth.
-Tell your baby you love them all of the time and show that same affection to your husband in front of your baby.
-Buy a basic kit of essential oils (lavender especially!)
-Get a Thera Pearl heating/cooling pack. I sat on a frozen one every day for a week when I came home from the hospital. I have also used it when Evie has had really bad constipation. She loves when I heat it up now and put it on her belly.
-Boudreux's Butt paste is the bomb!
-Limit TV time, yes it's going to happen, but honestly I only let E watch 1 hour maybe and 1 1/2 of TV a day. There are much better ways to occupy and help your baby learn (sensory toys, reading, you). She knows when we do watch a movie it is a treat, and I get really good cuddles.
-Get a portable fan to clip on car seat for the summer
Well that's it. It has been a lot of trial and error these last few months. You will grow as much as your baby will, in different ways of course. I have been so grateful that I've learned hard and easy things to help me be a better mom and wife. I really hope this helps at least someone!
Go forth and be the best Mommy you can!
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