I know most of you won't care about this post, but I know my future self will be grateful for it. Potty training is so tricky and it really tested my patience. I know everyone experiences it differently and each kid is different. I did a bunch of research on tricks and tips. I didn't just stick to one, I tried a few different ones and even combined some.
Let's start from the beginning. Spencer and I wanted to have Evie potty trained before our new little one arrives. I can't even begin to tell you how many people told me I should wait until the new baby came. A good chunk of these same people told me Evie was too young (she is 22 months) and it wasn't worth my time to even try. Here's the thing; I kind of get why people told me these things, but it really made me doubt my abilities to teach Evie a hard task. Let's all be kind and not mom shame those who try things differently and earlier than others. I am with her all day, every day and paid attention to all of her signs and wouldn't have started this if I didn't feel she was ready.
Here are some signs that triggered this whole process. She would go days (I guess nights) without a wet diaper in the morning. This told me that she could hold it and wait at least until she was up. She was going less and less in her diaper and usually would have big diapers if I didn't change it all of the time. The biggest one was she would tell me when her diaper was wet or when she was pooping or had just pooped. She already followed me to the bathroom and was really interested in what I was doing, so I just let her come each time I went to peak a bigger interest.
I knew timing was an issue for us. Meaning I wasn't quite sure how frequently she went and how much. So I took Evie to the store and let her find underwear and pull-ups that she wanted. This helped her become interested as she didn't know what underwear was, but anything with Minnie Mouse or mermaids on it she was all for. After I told her what they were, I would put underwear over her diaper for a few hours the first week just to get her used to them.
I bought a potty seat (link here) to help her feel comfortable on the toilet and if you are trying to potty train your kiddos, I highly recommend buying one compared to their own potty. Once we got the potty seat I took one day at a time to see how long we could go without an wet diaper. At first I took her every ten minutes, but quickly changed that to 25 minutes. For the first almost three weeks, 25 minutes seemed to go really well and then we slowly adjusted it to longer times. During the first week, I tried giving her a spoonful of peanut butter just to get her to stay on the toilet and try to go. By the time she finished the peanut butter (which wasn't every time!), she usually had gone to the bathroom. She easily mastered going #1 pretty quick because of this.
Now, the first week, she did SO good! I was shocked. She went both #1 and #2 without any problems and enjoyed the skittles/extra treats we gave her for doing so. Week 2 was our hardest yet. Although she would still go on the toilet, she had the most accidents here. I know regressions are totally normal, but this week made me feel defeated. She also would not go to the bathroom for anyone but myself. When I went to school and Spencer would take over she had so many accidents and would kick and scream when he took her. So over a weekend when we were both home, I would make Spencer take her and I would hid outside the door. Finally she started to go while I was at school.
Tips:
-You and your spouse/significant other should be involved.
-Watch your little one's body language (hiding, grunting, holding themselves, being extra quiet after being noisy, etc.)
-Charts with stickers and prizes and/or treats truly help (We let Evie pick her treats, and it was M&M's. We gave one for trying, and two for actually going. Prizes (from the Dollar Store) we did for pooping, which we started at week 4 and it helped a lot!)
-Be positive. Potty training is a stressful time for you and your little one. If you need to let your anger out, don't do it in front of your child. They will remember that and think going to the bathroom is a bad thing on the toilet.
-Give it time. We gave ourselves plenty of flexibility until she understood what going to the bathroom meant. Some kids pick it up quick, Evie took 5 weeks, although we still need to remind her it's time to try to go to the bathroom. We also are working on pooping everyday. Evie likes to hold it for a few days and she is in so much pain.
-Talk to other moms who are going through the same thing, it really does help to bounce ideas and frustrations off of each other.
-Make it fun! We would sing two or three songs if she was struggling to go and it usually worked. We also found a potty song on YouTube (found here) and she loved that!
-Be encouraging and always say good job because having that good memory of going will stick with them and will pay off later on!
-Don't force them to stay on the toilet for a long time. If they need to go, they will go pretty quick. Forcing them to stay on the potty will only make them angry and not want to continue to go. What worked for us is we would do 15 minutes max and if nothing, we would try again in 15 minutes and usually that worked.
- Don't stay in the bathroom every time they go. Obviously make sure they are safe, but with Evie since she was a hider in the first place, allowing privacy helped her go in her own time. She picked it up faster than when we would stay in there the whole time. Honestly when I stayed in there the whole time she would get so mad and then I would get mad. So it helped to take a break.
-Don't get mad when accidents happen. Easier said than done. Seriously though it helps to point out that they had an accident and such and explain why it is bad, but don't scold. With Evie since she had Minnie pull-ups and underwear we would always tell her to keep Minnie dry and then Minnie would be happy and warm. Evie totally understood that and started to tell us really fast if Minnie was sad because she was wet.
-Don't be afraid to try new things. I seriously tried a whole bunch and had to switch in the middle. What ultimately worked is 5 days of commando. When she peed on her legs she cried and did not like that feeling. She learned how to hold really well and told us when she had to go potty. Obviously there is a learning curve here. Every time E passes gas, she thinks she is pooping and runs to the bathroom. It's super cute and I'll probably tease her about it later. For the last two weeks of our journey, she typically would have accidents mostly on our fault. We would forget to take her before we hopped in the shower, or forgot to watch the time at dinner.
Anyway Evie has really impressed me. Although she is not perfect yet and still needs reminders, she hasn't had an accident in over a week because she knows. Potty training is one of those things that makes you grateful you don't remember doing it when you were younger. Evie might have taken a long time, but I promise if Evie can do it at 22 months, anyone can do at that age. Don't give up! You got this!
Let's start from the beginning. Spencer and I wanted to have Evie potty trained before our new little one arrives. I can't even begin to tell you how many people told me I should wait until the new baby came. A good chunk of these same people told me Evie was too young (she is 22 months) and it wasn't worth my time to even try. Here's the thing; I kind of get why people told me these things, but it really made me doubt my abilities to teach Evie a hard task. Let's all be kind and not mom shame those who try things differently and earlier than others. I am with her all day, every day and paid attention to all of her signs and wouldn't have started this if I didn't feel she was ready.
Here are some signs that triggered this whole process. She would go days (I guess nights) without a wet diaper in the morning. This told me that she could hold it and wait at least until she was up. She was going less and less in her diaper and usually would have big diapers if I didn't change it all of the time. The biggest one was she would tell me when her diaper was wet or when she was pooping or had just pooped. She already followed me to the bathroom and was really interested in what I was doing, so I just let her come each time I went to peak a bigger interest.
I knew timing was an issue for us. Meaning I wasn't quite sure how frequently she went and how much. So I took Evie to the store and let her find underwear and pull-ups that she wanted. This helped her become interested as she didn't know what underwear was, but anything with Minnie Mouse or mermaids on it she was all for. After I told her what they were, I would put underwear over her diaper for a few hours the first week just to get her used to them.
I bought a potty seat (link here) to help her feel comfortable on the toilet and if you are trying to potty train your kiddos, I highly recommend buying one compared to their own potty. Once we got the potty seat I took one day at a time to see how long we could go without an wet diaper. At first I took her every ten minutes, but quickly changed that to 25 minutes. For the first almost three weeks, 25 minutes seemed to go really well and then we slowly adjusted it to longer times. During the first week, I tried giving her a spoonful of peanut butter just to get her to stay on the toilet and try to go. By the time she finished the peanut butter (which wasn't every time!), she usually had gone to the bathroom. She easily mastered going #1 pretty quick because of this.
Now, the first week, she did SO good! I was shocked. She went both #1 and #2 without any problems and enjoyed the skittles/extra treats we gave her for doing so. Week 2 was our hardest yet. Although she would still go on the toilet, she had the most accidents here. I know regressions are totally normal, but this week made me feel defeated. She also would not go to the bathroom for anyone but myself. When I went to school and Spencer would take over she had so many accidents and would kick and scream when he took her. So over a weekend when we were both home, I would make Spencer take her and I would hid outside the door. Finally she started to go while I was at school.
Tips:
-You and your spouse/significant other should be involved.
-Watch your little one's body language (hiding, grunting, holding themselves, being extra quiet after being noisy, etc.)
-Charts with stickers and prizes and/or treats truly help (We let Evie pick her treats, and it was M&M's. We gave one for trying, and two for actually going. Prizes (from the Dollar Store) we did for pooping, which we started at week 4 and it helped a lot!)
-Be positive. Potty training is a stressful time for you and your little one. If you need to let your anger out, don't do it in front of your child. They will remember that and think going to the bathroom is a bad thing on the toilet.
-Give it time. We gave ourselves plenty of flexibility until she understood what going to the bathroom meant. Some kids pick it up quick, Evie took 5 weeks, although we still need to remind her it's time to try to go to the bathroom. We also are working on pooping everyday. Evie likes to hold it for a few days and she is in so much pain.
-Talk to other moms who are going through the same thing, it really does help to bounce ideas and frustrations off of each other.
-Make it fun! We would sing two or three songs if she was struggling to go and it usually worked. We also found a potty song on YouTube (found here) and she loved that!
-Be encouraging and always say good job because having that good memory of going will stick with them and will pay off later on!
-Don't force them to stay on the toilet for a long time. If they need to go, they will go pretty quick. Forcing them to stay on the potty will only make them angry and not want to continue to go. What worked for us is we would do 15 minutes max and if nothing, we would try again in 15 minutes and usually that worked.
- Don't stay in the bathroom every time they go. Obviously make sure they are safe, but with Evie since she was a hider in the first place, allowing privacy helped her go in her own time. She picked it up faster than when we would stay in there the whole time. Honestly when I stayed in there the whole time she would get so mad and then I would get mad. So it helped to take a break.
-Don't get mad when accidents happen. Easier said than done. Seriously though it helps to point out that they had an accident and such and explain why it is bad, but don't scold. With Evie since she had Minnie pull-ups and underwear we would always tell her to keep Minnie dry and then Minnie would be happy and warm. Evie totally understood that and started to tell us really fast if Minnie was sad because she was wet.
-Don't be afraid to try new things. I seriously tried a whole bunch and had to switch in the middle. What ultimately worked is 5 days of commando. When she peed on her legs she cried and did not like that feeling. She learned how to hold really well and told us when she had to go potty. Obviously there is a learning curve here. Every time E passes gas, she thinks she is pooping and runs to the bathroom. It's super cute and I'll probably tease her about it later. For the last two weeks of our journey, she typically would have accidents mostly on our fault. We would forget to take her before we hopped in the shower, or forgot to watch the time at dinner.
Anyway Evie has really impressed me. Although she is not perfect yet and still needs reminders, she hasn't had an accident in over a week because she knows. Potty training is one of those things that makes you grateful you don't remember doing it when you were younger. Evie might have taken a long time, but I promise if Evie can do it at 22 months, anyone can do at that age. Don't give up! You got this!
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